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What If You Taught Lessons On How To Be In A Relationship With You?

imagesYou can teach the people around you how to have a successful and enjoyable relationship with ….YOU! First, you will need to take the time to consider WHO you are in a relationship and HOW you want to structure your connections with friends, colleagues, acquaintances, and others. This step is important as defining relationship needs can enable you to communicate what you want and then get it! Once you can identify what works for you and what does not, you can teach others how to be in a relationship with you and learn what their relationship expectations are as well. Taking responsibility for providing important information to others on what will and will not work for you relationship-wise is a wonderful first step toward building community for yourself. This can add up to more satisfying and more productive relationships with those you choose to connect with (and even with those you can’t choose but have to be in relationship with—think bosses, co-workers, in-laws, etc).

You can begin your journey to more enjoyable relating by answering this simple question Read more

Making The Emotional Shift From SPOUSE to CO-PARENT: Part 2

coparemtsIn Part 1 of this 2 part series, we examined the role feelings play as parents move through the ending of the marriage/divorce process and then beyond  into a co-parenting relationship. In this article, we will explore how to effectively make the emotional shift from spouse to ex-spouse to cooperative co-parent, in two big steps. In Step 1,  you will Read more

Making The Emotional Shift From SPOUSE To CO-PARENT: Part 1

new famWhat does it take to transition emotionally from spouses to ‘exes’ to co-parents? How can you engage peacefully in the business of raising healthy children with someone you used to be married to with all of that history between you? Rolling back your relationship to a more formal, business-like arrangement might seem impossible, but while it can be a challenging and difficult process,  it is do-able. It’s also much better for your children.

While there is no perfect “How To” on this, there are some guidelines that can help you Read more

Learn to Fight Less With Your Spouse

happy credoWant to fight less with your spouse? Then don’t be yourself! It’s only natural for there to be disagreement from time to time between any two people in a relationship. How you work things out (or don’t) has a great impact on your day to day life and on your marriage overall. So, how do you and your spouse go about fighting or disagreeing?

Do you do what you have always done or are you thinking of trying something different? How you choose to fight or try to settle disagreements has an enormous impact on the quality of your day to day life together. Couples often fall into a repetitive pattern of behavior when conflict rears its ugly head. This pattern may be undetectable to the spouses who are enacting it, but a studied, objective eye can be helpful in spotting the types of thinking, feelings, and behaviors are getting repeated. Here are a few examples of the unhelpful patterns that couples can fall into when each person is just acting as they always act and being “themselves”: Read more