So many important decisions must be made during the Massachusetts divorce process, yet how do you accomplish this when you may be feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or uncertain? What about all of the emotions that have built up between you over time or the persistent patterns of negative behavior that seem to be coloring your thinking about what you want or need? Sometimes the divorce process even becomes derailed by complicated issues that demand difficult decisions and even sacrifices, unexpressed emotions, or an inability to stop arguing and end the conflict. Bringing a coach on board to study the situation with a neutral eye, work compassionately with the clients individually and/or together, and consult with the attorneys or mediator can put the process back on track to create a successful outcome for you and your family.
Clients often need the help of a coach to sort through and manage their feelings and clear the way of emotions attached to a particular issue or area of the divorce agreement (parenting plan, property division, disposition of the family home) so that negotiations can take place and agreement can be reached. A coach can assist clients to unravel the layers of complexity around a particular issue, feel clearer, and then move ahead in decision making. This is typically accomplished via: acknowledging the specific difficulties and concerns, outlining and prioritizing the areas to be addressed, defining what is truly important to the individuals and family members involved, brainstorming options, and selecting from alternatives. In this way, a coach can help you both move through particular obstacles or through the entire process, from start to finish.
Collaborative Divorce Coaching
The coach is an essential member of the collaborative professional team and works closely with both clients and collaboratively trained attorneys. As the only neutral member of the team, the collaborative coach is charged with establishing a safe and productive working environment for clients, facilitating all meetings, and assuring that the needs of both individuals and all family members are addressed and incorporated into the divorce agreement.
For more information on collaborative divorce and the collaborative coach, go to: Collaborative Divorce
Children deserve to have the time, attention, love, and energy of two parents, but many divorcing spouses wonder how they will ever be able to work and communicate successfully together to co-parent their children. Using a divorce coach as a co-parenting consultant can help to you to:
- Explore how to stop the fighting, resolve conflict and start cooperating
- Learn how to strengthen your co-parenting relationship so it works better for you and your family
- Plan how you will talk with your children about the divorce and what happens next
- Establish and refine a co-parent communication system that will keep information flowing between you
- Put systems in place that will help your children feel secure and cared for
- Learn tips for establishing a comfortable new household and help the children transition into it
- Minimize confusion and chaos in the flow/movement of your child/children from one household to the other
- Talk through and Agree upon many of the ‘What happens when…’ situations you will encounter
- And more!
Divorce Support Groups
Now forming, separate groups for women and for men undergoing or healing from divorce. Groups meet for a 75 minute session, twice per month to discuss a variety of divorce and post-divorce related topics. Members can ‘tell their story’ and hear those of others, share wisdom and knowledge, and form supportive connections with others in group. Divorce Support Group offers a safe and confidential environment where members can achieve new awareness and feel understood.
Betsy Ross, LICSW